Hi !
Hope this finds everyone's week going ok. Here on the east coast we have been getting some much needed rain. So far its been raining since sunday! And i'm not complaining. i enjoy the rain and we need it ! According to the weather guy he says its been the dryest summer here in a long while. We sure have had some crazy weather here. It was 70's and 80's in march and april and then back to 70's in may and then in june it just was mid 70's and 80's , then towards the end of june we got record heat, jumping quickly to the high 90's. When my sister was here we were over 100 degrees every single day. We had no break from the 100 degree weather and add in the humidity it was killer! At the end of july we got a nice weekend of mid 70's with no humidity and it actually felt cold, but it was nice. So far in august we havent had to many overly warm days. Yes we have had high 80's but most of it has been without humidity so its been nice. We can turn the air conditioners off and open the windows and get nice breezes through the house.
We moved here in november and we were worried that we would encounter snow etc on our travels. We did see some snow in mountain passes and both the hubs and i grew up on this side of the country. He in new hampshire and myself in michigan. We both know that sometimes you can get snow as early as october( dont nay say peeps i remember when i was younger that we had snow on halloween once!) But we got here and it was around 60's and no snow so we were stoked! We had a mild winter we had snow but not the snow like they have had in the past. All of the fam has said we got lucky, but i dont know about that, we came to visit christmas 2008 and we came prepared for tons of snow and brought all the neccessary items to play in it and got none! I was bummed i really wanted a white christmas!! On the day that we went to explore boston it was 70 fricken degrees in DECEMBER!!!
So in saying all this and experiencing this weird weather i wonder what this upcoming fall and winter will hold for us. I love the fall and am looking forward to the leaves changing and the warm fuzzy sweaters and sweatshirts. Im looking for the nites where we just lock ourselves in and snuggle. The nites of apple cider or hot cocoa. I know it sounds crazy but i cant wait. I cant wait because its starts off the holidays with halloween ( whoever says its not a holiday is soo wrong!) then turkey day and black friday and then of course christmas and new years! i cant wait for fall to turn into winter and to get that first snow! and if it melts away to get more snows ! i think it makes it so pretty outside! The only thing i hate is when there are snow days during the year because they usually have to be made up in june :(
I know we live in snow country, but still last year we were out the few days before christmas break was to start and therefore the kids didnt get out till june 21. thats just dumb to get out so late, i think the teachers should have said that they would give up some of their planning days ( the kids usually dont go on those days) to make up for some of the days missed.
Im still job hunting since the job in the school district didnt work out. id like something compatible to the kids schedule since im the one that has to miss when they are sick etc. A school job would be awsome since you would be off the same as them. Im pretty bummed that it didnt work out. I emailed her after the interview to ask some questions that i forgot then and got no response, and i also emailed to thank her for the interview and the opportunity and she has still never responded , i know she may be busy but she has emailed me before at 9 and 10 pm. Oh well.We cant go long with me not having a job since it seems lately everyone is planning crap around when our bills are due. they and food shopping are the most important.
But a friend of ours planned a wedding right at the beginning of sept. right when rent is due and then car payments. the sucky thing about it being right then is that we are both in the wedding and we have to pay 150$ to rent a tux..really 150$ for something you wear for a few hours...im pissed.Thank god she didnt want the girls to buy a dress she wanted to see what kind of nice dresses everyone had and luckliy i had bought one for another formal occasion that you could wear in or too a wedding! But not only with the cost of bills and the tux we have to pay for gas to get there and we have to bribe the hubs mother to watch the kids!! First off no one would watch them, and hey we never really ask. So we were going to keep them friday for the rehersal etc. Then we just needed his mother to watch them saturday for the wedding. She was going to take them to a demo derby if we paid for it, we were like fine it was like 15$. Then shes now changed it to she wants to go camping so she will take them both days, but she wants us to pay for 1 day of camping and their food. Get this though, she takes his sisters kid all the time during the week and almost every weekend and she never requires her to pay for anything, so why our our kids different. The hubs is pissed because on top of never asking his parents for anything except every once in awhile we are required to pay his mother to take the kids and then his sister never does. And no one even called or sent a card for M's birthday so hes equally pissed about that. I mean part of the reason we got the job transfer here was to be closer to family. so the kids would have their grandparents, we could go to family functions etc but never imagined this at all. so we are a bit shell shocked. I mean do they not get that right now we have limited income and limited resources? hmmm makes you wonder!
Showing posts with label job hunting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label job hunting. Show all posts
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Friday, August 20, 2010
Coping....
Hi there All!
I realize i didnt write last week, as i had planned but somethings came up and it kind of took the wind out of my sails. As you know, or may not know i have a daughter that died at birth. I wrote this about her http://piecesofthepepins.blogspot.com/2010/04/very-hard-but-special-weekend.html
When she passed the hospital gave us a memory box. In it is all of the braclets we both had, the blankets, hats etc that they used or had for her. Its been at my moms in michigan because when i got divorced i moved back there and everything i had was there. After my mom passed we couldnt find it at all. I was paranoid. The only memories of my baby girl were gone. Well my mom sneaky as she could be had put it away where it wouldnt get tossed or misplaced. it was in her closet.Thank heavens.Its all i had besides the things in my head and the flashbacks ( trust me i can see every second of that day in my head!) So not long ago my siblings had come upon it and sent it my way. Ever since then i put it in a box in my room as it doesnt get misplaced. It includes not only the things listed above but they took her hand and foot prints, her measurements and we also clipped some of her curly black hair..she had tons you couldnt even tell we did it. I have some pics of her gravesite at the cemetary. Being 21 when i lost her i couldnt afford a headstone, and knew i wouldnt be able to any time in the near future so my mother built a flower box and planted mums in it and then had an angel statue in the center. she also got one of those yard stakes ( the kind you can hang flags or bird feeders from) and found a wind chime that had angels and thats how we marked her spot. i was grateful to her for going there and doing this but she really couldnt understand what i was going thru as she had never lost a child. Well some of you may find this creepy but at the time of michaela's birth the hospital has a group of people that help you when you loose a child. They came in and were with us after she was born. Stayed with us as we held her and tried our hardest to say our goodbyes to this precious girl that we had waited for for 9 months. My dad was in the same state at the time and came as soon as i called and it was very hard for him to see and deal with. After all i was his baby and i was having to say goodbye to my baby. Well you know how you get hospital photos. They do take them even if they child has passed. SHe just looks like she is sleeping. I also had a girlfriend who came up to the hospital and took private photos for us, as she knew what i was experienceing as she had a daughter pass away at 7 months.
I havent seen the pics in years. As i have stated the first 5 years were a killer for me and then it got slowly easier. This year was tough as she would be 13 and no doubt have "bieber fever" ( trust me i would have loved it!!) Well the only ones who had seen the photos besides me, and my mom was my grandmother ..she too had lost a child. Well my grandmother died 1 year and 8 days after my mom. My aunts were the ones in charge of boxing up all of my grandma's things and clearing the hosue etc. Well my aunt is moving and is going thru stuff and had found a box that was my grandmother's things that she has put off going thru. In this box was birth and death certificates( her and my mother did geneology of my grandfathers family so they did have a lot of records) and baby books etc.
Well in this box was an envelope and my aunt who had lost a baby to placenta previa and never saw her baby thought they were pics of him and they werent they were the pics of michaela. The one hospital photo, the pics of her being weighed. me holding her. Again they were never meant for every one. At her funeral we had an open casket but she wasnt yucky too look at she just looked like a baby sleeping. she wasnt purple ,blue or any other color she just looked pink and like she was asleep. My mother wouldnt have done that too me or my siblings as they would have been traumatized forever. SO after looking at them and being traumatized she messages me on facebook and tells me she found them and needed my address to send them. I apologized to her for traumatizing her but explained they were never for everyone. She told me i had to promise not to meltdown when i got them, thats not what she wanted to happen.
Well i got them last tuesday. I ripped the envelope open and stood there and looked, hiding them from brian, as he doesnt really understand it, and the one pic i did have here said he was bothered looking at it. I have to say i did get a little teary at first sight. I came into my room got her memory box out and looked over everything and then placed her pics inside so they wouldnt be lost. Then that nite, really not knowing why i went into my room and took the box out again and looked at everything. touching and holding everything she touched. all the while looking at her pictures. It was like i was torturing myself, why because when i saw her again i truly missed her like it had just happened all over again. Loosing a child is never easy. i called my sister and was sobbing and she said nothing against me but maybe i shouldnt have them because look what it does to me. But she knew its all ill ever have of her. I've had to make my self not go back and keep looking at them. i just had the meltdown tuesday and havent looked again, but it does take some recovery time. I would never want someone i know to experience a loss like that its heart wrenching and devestating. And anything can bring that pain back to the surface i have realized.
In other news i went for an interview for the job in the school district. It went well but as i havent heard and school starts tuesday there i dont think i got it. Oh well back to the drawing board! We toured a preschool and it was great and where we would want M to go if i get a day job or school job. Speaking of M its almost his birthday! He will be 4!!!! OMG.
well thats all for today folks! Have a great monday!
I realize i didnt write last week, as i had planned but somethings came up and it kind of took the wind out of my sails. As you know, or may not know i have a daughter that died at birth. I wrote this about her http://piecesofthepepins.blogspot.com/2010/04/very-hard-but-special-weekend.html
When she passed the hospital gave us a memory box. In it is all of the braclets we both had, the blankets, hats etc that they used or had for her. Its been at my moms in michigan because when i got divorced i moved back there and everything i had was there. After my mom passed we couldnt find it at all. I was paranoid. The only memories of my baby girl were gone. Well my mom sneaky as she could be had put it away where it wouldnt get tossed or misplaced. it was in her closet.Thank heavens.Its all i had besides the things in my head and the flashbacks ( trust me i can see every second of that day in my head!) So not long ago my siblings had come upon it and sent it my way. Ever since then i put it in a box in my room as it doesnt get misplaced. It includes not only the things listed above but they took her hand and foot prints, her measurements and we also clipped some of her curly black hair..she had tons you couldnt even tell we did it. I have some pics of her gravesite at the cemetary. Being 21 when i lost her i couldnt afford a headstone, and knew i wouldnt be able to any time in the near future so my mother built a flower box and planted mums in it and then had an angel statue in the center. she also got one of those yard stakes ( the kind you can hang flags or bird feeders from) and found a wind chime that had angels and thats how we marked her spot. i was grateful to her for going there and doing this but she really couldnt understand what i was going thru as she had never lost a child. Well some of you may find this creepy but at the time of michaela's birth the hospital has a group of people that help you when you loose a child. They came in and were with us after she was born. Stayed with us as we held her and tried our hardest to say our goodbyes to this precious girl that we had waited for for 9 months. My dad was in the same state at the time and came as soon as i called and it was very hard for him to see and deal with. After all i was his baby and i was having to say goodbye to my baby. Well you know how you get hospital photos. They do take them even if they child has passed. SHe just looks like she is sleeping. I also had a girlfriend who came up to the hospital and took private photos for us, as she knew what i was experienceing as she had a daughter pass away at 7 months.
I havent seen the pics in years. As i have stated the first 5 years were a killer for me and then it got slowly easier. This year was tough as she would be 13 and no doubt have "bieber fever" ( trust me i would have loved it!!) Well the only ones who had seen the photos besides me, and my mom was my grandmother ..she too had lost a child. Well my grandmother died 1 year and 8 days after my mom. My aunts were the ones in charge of boxing up all of my grandma's things and clearing the hosue etc. Well my aunt is moving and is going thru stuff and had found a box that was my grandmother's things that she has put off going thru. In this box was birth and death certificates( her and my mother did geneology of my grandfathers family so they did have a lot of records) and baby books etc.
Well in this box was an envelope and my aunt who had lost a baby to placenta previa and never saw her baby thought they were pics of him and they werent they were the pics of michaela. The one hospital photo, the pics of her being weighed. me holding her. Again they were never meant for every one. At her funeral we had an open casket but she wasnt yucky too look at she just looked like a baby sleeping. she wasnt purple ,blue or any other color she just looked pink and like she was asleep. My mother wouldnt have done that too me or my siblings as they would have been traumatized forever. SO after looking at them and being traumatized she messages me on facebook and tells me she found them and needed my address to send them. I apologized to her for traumatizing her but explained they were never for everyone. She told me i had to promise not to meltdown when i got them, thats not what she wanted to happen.
Well i got them last tuesday. I ripped the envelope open and stood there and looked, hiding them from brian, as he doesnt really understand it, and the one pic i did have here said he was bothered looking at it. I have to say i did get a little teary at first sight. I came into my room got her memory box out and looked over everything and then placed her pics inside so they wouldnt be lost. Then that nite, really not knowing why i went into my room and took the box out again and looked at everything. touching and holding everything she touched. all the while looking at her pictures. It was like i was torturing myself, why because when i saw her again i truly missed her like it had just happened all over again. Loosing a child is never easy. i called my sister and was sobbing and she said nothing against me but maybe i shouldnt have them because look what it does to me. But she knew its all ill ever have of her. I've had to make my self not go back and keep looking at them. i just had the meltdown tuesday and havent looked again, but it does take some recovery time. I would never want someone i know to experience a loss like that its heart wrenching and devestating. And anything can bring that pain back to the surface i have realized.
In other news i went for an interview for the job in the school district. It went well but as i havent heard and school starts tuesday there i dont think i got it. Oh well back to the drawing board! We toured a preschool and it was great and where we would want M to go if i get a day job or school job. Speaking of M its almost his birthday! He will be 4!!!! OMG.
well thats all for today folks! Have a great monday!
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
A small miracle...a miracle non the less
Hi Everyone!!
Hope this finds you well! Lets get right to it! well the other day i wrote about M being a picky eater. Which he is. Luckily when we were camping there was enough around that he would eat and we brought some stuff in case he wouldnt. Hes a good eater for the most part but im getting tired of making two meals mostly at dinner, or packing something for him if we go to a family get together. As i stated he likes pasta, grilled cheese,fruit,veggies,chicken nuggets,pizza,mac and cheese,pbj. he drinks mostly milk and water (but doesnt fill up on milk) and oatmeal and likes oj but not to many other juices. Well the other nite i made salisbury steak, stuffing and corn for dinner. i cut up about 1/4 of a piece of steak and put it on his plate and ladeled some gravy on top of it. he was having none of it he started throwing a fit saying he didnt like it and he didnt want that. While everyone else is sitting there eating without an issue. The hubs got up and said how do you know you dont like it , you havent tried it. finally he got his sticker book out and told him if he ate two pieces of it he could choose a sticker in it. HE ATE 2 PIECES!!!! we were amazed.Then we went back to eating and just told him to eat everything else and he finished his meat on his own and some of the corn!!!! i was beyond thrilled that he ate it hoping we were on our way back to just making one meal at dinner time, because usually he eats fine at breakfast and lunch. But then part of my brain was thinking, if the only way we are going to get him to eat is bribe him, how long will we have to do that since we were using that to potty train him. we have that pretty much down pat except for getting him out of diapers at nap and bedtime and also going in public places. ANY IDEAS? on either the eating or the rest of the potty training? HELP!!!
in other news i quit my job! due to no hours ( 12 hrs for the whole month of june) and they forced me to do training i didnt want and im still just cashiering without utilizing the training. it isnt worth it for me to drive 45 min for one day a week just to make enough money for a tank of gas. This is my last week.I have been actively looking for something else. something in the school district so i can work why the kids are in school and have the same breaks and vacays etc. i have also been looking for something else that is evening related so we wont have to pay a sitter and just pocket the whole check. So far only a few leads but im hoping to find something soon that im making a bit more than i was at my almost old job. Wish me luck friends!
Well im off for now but send me the ideas for picky eating and potty training your recipes and also book suggestions, i look forward to getting all of them
Hope this finds you well! Lets get right to it! well the other day i wrote about M being a picky eater. Which he is. Luckily when we were camping there was enough around that he would eat and we brought some stuff in case he wouldnt. Hes a good eater for the most part but im getting tired of making two meals mostly at dinner, or packing something for him if we go to a family get together. As i stated he likes pasta, grilled cheese,fruit,veggies,chicken nuggets,pizza,mac and cheese,pbj. he drinks mostly milk and water (but doesnt fill up on milk) and oatmeal and likes oj but not to many other juices. Well the other nite i made salisbury steak, stuffing and corn for dinner. i cut up about 1/4 of a piece of steak and put it on his plate and ladeled some gravy on top of it. he was having none of it he started throwing a fit saying he didnt like it and he didnt want that. While everyone else is sitting there eating without an issue. The hubs got up and said how do you know you dont like it , you havent tried it. finally he got his sticker book out and told him if he ate two pieces of it he could choose a sticker in it. HE ATE 2 PIECES!!!! we were amazed.Then we went back to eating and just told him to eat everything else and he finished his meat on his own and some of the corn!!!! i was beyond thrilled that he ate it hoping we were on our way back to just making one meal at dinner time, because usually he eats fine at breakfast and lunch. But then part of my brain was thinking, if the only way we are going to get him to eat is bribe him, how long will we have to do that since we were using that to potty train him. we have that pretty much down pat except for getting him out of diapers at nap and bedtime and also going in public places. ANY IDEAS? on either the eating or the rest of the potty training? HELP!!!
in other news i quit my job! due to no hours ( 12 hrs for the whole month of june) and they forced me to do training i didnt want and im still just cashiering without utilizing the training. it isnt worth it for me to drive 45 min for one day a week just to make enough money for a tank of gas. This is my last week.I have been actively looking for something else. something in the school district so i can work why the kids are in school and have the same breaks and vacays etc. i have also been looking for something else that is evening related so we wont have to pay a sitter and just pocket the whole check. So far only a few leads but im hoping to find something soon that im making a bit more than i was at my almost old job. Wish me luck friends!
Well im off for now but send me the ideas for picky eating and potty training your recipes and also book suggestions, i look forward to getting all of them
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